First, let’s start with Gratitude.

  • I am extremely grateful for my wife.  The reasons are too numerous to mention, frankly, but the fact is that our heavy lifting has not come without strains and soreness; we work on our own unpacking while we support each other on our shared journey and these things are not easy, especially when one suffers from anxiety and depression.  I’m listening now, not just hearing, and I’m grateful for the chance to not only show these advancements but to be appreciated for them.
  • I’m appreciative of the support I’ve received from the handful of people with whom I’ve truly discussed my alcoholism.  It should be, but it’s not easy to talk to someone about something that, unfortunately, we view in a negative light.  It does take a lot of strength to see the need for change and then actually do those things.  I couldn’t have done it without Ivonne and my therapist.  Straight up.
  • Those are kind of general things, sure, so let’s make it a bit more specific.  I’m thankful that I can fit into old clothes that I saved for just such an occasion.
  • I’m glad to be able to help Reza with her homework every Sunday, even though I might not be in the mood.
  • I’m lucky to have amazing friends that I get to chat with daily.  I’m luckier to have old friends watching from afar.  TK, I’m looking at you.
  • I’ve got a couple trips on the horizon:  One to see my brother in Kansas City in January, another to Santa Rosa to visit Faith and Jillian in December and a tentative plan to go see Styles in Connecticut.  Ivonne and Reza will be in Mexico in mid-December, so, honestly, I’m looking forward to the solitude.  Sometimes, you just need some time to yourself.  I’m glad all these events are coming up relatively shortly.
  • Finally, I’m thankful that I’ve got some advil to help with this headache.  😀

OH!  Let’s move on to Yoga.

So, I can finally put my heels on the ground during Downward Facing Dog.  It only took six months.  HAH.  I’m taking the time lately to really fine-tune my positioning in every pose.  Fuck, is this ever hard, but again, worth it.

With that in mind, last time I checked, I lost 46 pounds.  That looks fucking insane on paper, but in reality, it doesn’t feel like a lot.  Just kinda goes to show how much work I really had to do.  What it’s given me, though, is the perspective on goals – as in, I can kinda have them now.  For now, I’m gonna shoot for another 40.  Why not?  I mean, it’s doable, that much is sure.  I’ve just gotta keep the drive going.

The last few weeks, maybe even three weeks, have been kinda slacky.  I’ve been eating worse and not following my rules relative to what I ingest.  I gotta get back to that.  And frankly, I haven’t been doing yoga as much as I should be, either.  I got to a point where I thought I needed to scale it up a bit.  Personally, I think I need to re-commit to doing it every other day, no excuses.  Let’s rock that for a month before we start making advanced plans.

And, with that, I find myself losing steam.  Long day.  The last couple days have been pretty draining, not gonna lie.  I’ll write more about that tomorrow.

 

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